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The Calypso Chronicles: Pulling Princes

It Girls, designer bunnies and royal snogs – a hilarious exposé of English girls’ boarding schools

Even I, the Queen of Doomsday Prophecies, hadn’t considered the possibility that I would be forced to share a room with The Honourable Georgina Castle Orpington…

Calypso is the school misfit. She’s been packed off to St. Augustine’s from America, and it’s not just her accent that stands her apart from the posh Sloanes in her year…there’s her fencing expertise too – and her only friend is Star, another social outcast and daughter of an eighties rock legend. The cool It Girls, Ladies and Hons are making Calypso’s life miserable.

She starts the summer term of Year Ten determined to launch Operation Cool, to reinvent herself as a new worldly-wise and experienced-with-boys Calypso. The results are unexpected, effective and very entertaining, especially when Calypso receives some royal attention…

“Outrageously funny and a serious contender for the teen chick-lit throne.”
CLAUDIA MODY, THE BOOKSELLER

The Calypso Chronicles: Stealing Princes

Welcome to the madly privileged, exclusive world of the English all-girls boarding school, where Daddy’s plastic talks and Mummy’s connections say as much about you as the who’s-who list of texts on your mobile phone. The Saint Augustine uniform may be vile, but the girls are stunning and their brothers and boyfriends are either titled, famous or both.

The pressure is on Calypso as her first ball approaches. The battle lines have been drawn in her dorm room, now that she’s sharing with the toxic society It-Bitch, Honey, and grander-than-thou royal, Lady Portia Herrington Briggs. Calypso might be winning her bouts on the fencing piste, but she’s got serious competition if she’s going to hang on to Prince Freddie, especially when her expected invite to the annual Euro-Royal Bash doesn’t turn up!

A hilarious exposé of what it’s like to be ordinary in a world where extraordinary is the norm.

'A fresh and sassy new voice for teenage fiction, this is a hilarious look at the 'upmarket' teenage angst in boarding school culture.'
STARRED CHOICE, PUBLISHING NEWS.

The Calypso Chronicles: Dumping Princes

No one dumps a girl from Saint Augustines’!

Dating Prince Freddie is bliss as far as Calypso is concerned. So when her friends at the posh Saint Augustine’s School for Ladies decide to chuck their boyfriends and concentrate on their studies, Calypso is horrified! But not nearly as much as when Freds dumps her – setting into motion a chain of events that leads to a school-wide plan for a royal Counter Dump.

With her first international fencing competition coming up in Italy, and a captivating new boy showering her with attention, can Calypso pull it together and win her prince back? And even if she does, will she really be able to then dump him? All may be fair in love and war…unless, of course, you’re in love with a prince…

The Calypso Chronicles: Duelling Princes

Calypso might have pulled Prince Freddie, heir to the throne and the fittest boy on earth, but life becomes madly complicated when her mother arrives from LA and pitches up in England to spend time with her ‘boodjie woodjie’.

Not only is Calypso determined to make the national fencing team this year and keep her grades up, she now has to deal with her mad parents, sort of out her eccentric friends, make time for her prince before her lips forget how to kiss and – most challenging of all – defend herself against the queen of psycho toffs, the not-so Honourable Honey O’Hare.

But the course of Calypso’s life never did run smooth…